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Lawyer Jokes

Being a lawyer is not easy. Even after someone has graduated from the elite and expensive law school, in most country that person still needs to pass a bar examination before earning the right to practice law. The funny thing is, even with all the difficulties, lawyers are often distrusted and despised by public. They are considered as dishonest people that only work for money and reputation, and willing to do anything, including deceiving and falsifying evidences, to achieve victory in court.

Of course that not all lawyers are without moral. However, lawyer jokes that gaze on their bad traits are known by public. Luckily lawyers itself seem to have high sense of humor, as they often exchange these jokes among themselves as an icebreakers. Below you can read some of the most popular clean lawyer jokes. Hope you'll enjoy them!

Lawyer-Jokes

Collection of Layer Jokes:



Lawyer Joke #1: Lawyer's Heart

A man has a heart attack and is brought to the hospital emergency room. The doctor tells him that he will not live unless he has a heart transplant right away. Another doctor runs into the room and says, "You're in luck, two hearts just became available, so you will get to choose which one you want. One belongs to lawyer and the other to a social worker".

The man quickly responds, "The lawyer's!". The doctor says, "Wait! Don't you want to know a little about them before you make your decision?" The man says, "I already know enough. We all know that social workers are bleeding hearts and the lawyer's probably never used his. So I'll take my chance with the attorney's!"

Doctor Jokes

Doctor is always a good object for jokes in work jokes category. There are various themes for doctor jokes, which mostly about doctor-patient relationship and how doctor is always thought as an overpaid profession (although it's also a high-risk job). Unfortunately, most doctor jokes are also a dirty and vulgar jokes, which are not suitable to told to some people.

In this post you can read some clean doctor jokes, including some about dentist and veterinarian. I hope you'll find them funny enough!

funny-dentist

Collection of Doctor Jokes:

 

Doctor Joke #1: Dehydration

One afternoon, a man went to his doctor and told him that he hasn't been feeling well lately. The doctor examined the man, left the room, and came back with three different bottles of pills. The doctor said, "Take the green pill with a big glass of water when you wake up. Take the blue pill with a big glass of water after you eat lunch. Then just before going to bed, take the red pill with another big glass of water."

Startled to be put on so much medicine, the man stammered, "Jeez Doc, exactly what is my problem?" The doctor replied, "You're not drinking enough water."

American Football Jokes


American football jokes are very popular in the U.S, as it's their number one sport. The funny thing is, most of the jokes usually mock the American football players, assuming that the athletes are just a big muscular persons, but with little intelligence. Of course this is not (completely) true, as U.S applies student-athlete concept tightly, and many American football players received scholarships during their college years. You can read some examples of this mocking from American football jokes in this post. Enjoy!


Collection of American Football Jokes:

 

American Football Joke #1: Exam

Two college football players were taking an important final exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the big game the following week. The exam was fill-in-the-blank.

The last question read, "Old MacDonald had a ________."

Rodney was stumped. He had no idea what to answer. But he knew he needed to get this one right to be sure he passed. Making sure the professor wasn't watching, he tapped Buster on the shoulder. "Hey, Buster. What's the answer to the last question?"

Buster laughed. He looked around to make sure the professor hadn't noticed then he turned to Rodney. "Rodney, you're so stupid. Everyone knows Old MacDonald had a FARM."
"Oh yeah," said Rodney. "I remember now."

He picked up his pencil and started to write the answer in the blank. He stopped. Tapping Buster's shoulder again, he whispered, "Hey, how do you spell farm?"
"You are really dumb, bro. That's so easy. Farm is spelled E-I-E-I-O."

Baseball Jokes

Most people in the world don't appreciate baseball, and say that it's a long and boring game. That's maybe true, as a baseball game with extra innings can take around four to eight hours to finish, sometimes with only 1-0 score. However, for most North American people, and some in East Asia, baseball is an interesting sport. Home team is like their second religion, while the key players will become the local hero.

Now, whether you are a fan of this sport or not, you still can enjoy these baseball jokes, where you don't have to understand the game to understand the jokes!

Funny-Baseball-Picture

Collection of Funny Baseball Jokes:



Baseball Joke #1: Little League

Coming home from his first baseball game, Tommy swung open the front door very excited. Unable to attend the game, his father immediately wanted to know what happened. "So, how did you do son?" he asked.
"You'll never believe it dad!" Tommy said. "I was responsible for the winning run!"
"Really? How did you do that?"
"I dropped the ball."